“Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you.” Walter Winchell
Here are 5 basic elements to keep a healthy relationship going:
#1 You are important
A surprising one to start with but fundamental. No-it doesn’t mean “you are more important than others”, just that you have to love and appreciate who you are in order to attract like for like. Nobody wants a negative person in their life. No-one wants a partner who is constantly feeling that they are worthless. If you generate positive thinking about yourself, you will attract self-minded people who will be happy to share their lives with you.
If you are serious about your relationship, you must ask yourself what do you want from your relationship? It then follows, that if you set high standards for the type of partner you want, or if your partner already sets high standards then you must try and set the same benchmark for yourself. This then moves onto the second element:
#2 Make your partner’s needs your own
In order to make the relationship work, you need to establish what your partner’s needs are and making them your own. Is it security? Encouragement? Commitment? How do they want you to express your mutual understanding? Is it through empathy? Action? Touch?
Once you have an understanding of what your partner wants out of the relationship, and you feel the same, then you are already on the road to maintain a successful relationship. This has to be not only on an intellectual level, but also emotionally. Do not forget yourself, however, it is equally important that this devotion is shared by your partner and it should be reciprocated.
#3 Maintain communication
This means listening as well as talking. Whilst it is important to inform your partner what you feel or want, it works both ways. It is about what you can do for the person you care about. It is essential also that your partner responds in the same way.
Being honest and open with your partner is the key to success. You will have to face the bad times as well as the good, and if you face both with openness and honesty you will succeed in at least maintaining your own integrity. You do not need to avoid conflict. If your partner is worth all your attention, he or she will love you for these qualities you display.
#4 Maintain Trust
If you love them-set them free. If they love you, they are going nowhere. Trust means that you feel safe in the thought that your partner is reliable both physically and emotionally. And it can be built upon to make something strong and worthwhile.
Trust is most important in a relationship. From trust springs respect. Trust is vital during times in the relationship of stress, uncertainty and pain. If there is any doubt in your relationship, you need to go to step 3, or you will both suffer.
#5 Appreciate that you are both different
There are times that you will both disagree and/or realise that you are both different. This is perfectly natural and does not need to be an issue. Indeed, the differences were probably some of the reasons you both found each other interesting and worth further investigation.
It was at these times that you probably found that you had more in common than you initially considered which was the spark that started the fire!
With differences of opinion, you will need to try to understand and appreciate your partner’s position. Do not ignore it. You already should be aware of your partner’s views on most subjects, and if this is something new, just do what you did originally-just talk about it.
If you can accept and understand the differences, you can build on the aspects that you both already agree on, and you will appreciate the relationship you both have.
Although we confirmed 5 -there is a 6th element…….
KEEP IT GOING!
You have got to this point in your relationship which is healthy. You go forward by following the above-mentioned steps. If something comes up to challenge your relationship, however major or minor, learn from it and keep going. Keeping a healthy relationship is something you must cultivate and maintain, no matter how long the relationship has lasted. It is a process of working on it instinctively every day-and don’t forget-it should be enjoyable and fun-not an ordeal.
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In our previous video regarding relationships, “Creating a healthy relationship with your partner” which complements this post, we explored briefly the 5 basic elements of building up a relationship to be meaningful and successful. If you would like to view this video, please click on this link.
Finally, for the ultimate guide in relationships and a reference source to use for any eventuality, click here.